Fried Zucchini Chips

Crunchy, salty snacks can be hard to come by on a grain-free/paleo type diet.  Many people resort to eating nuts, which can come with its own set of issues.  Either allergies, or just plain overeating them.  Some salty snacks we like are chickpea poppers, kale chips, the occasional sweet potato chip, green bean chips, root chips, and now, zucchini chips. 

I don't have a suitable picture for posting because, well, they were butt ugly.  Little brown coins.  They hardly looked like zucchini.  But they were crunchy and salty to be sure!  They tasted pretty much like french fries! 

Are these an everyday treat? No.  They were fried in olive oil and quite a PITA to make, from the slicing to the frying, to the gross smoky greasy smell in my house.  But with some (homemade) ketchup, these were as close to french fries as I'll ever get!

Fried Zucchini Chips
4 large zucchinis
2 cups oil for frying
sea salt, to taste

Using a mandolin or your mandolin attachment thingy on your cuisinart, make chips of your zucchinis.  I arranged mine on paper towels and sprinkled with salt about an hour before frying to release some moisture.  Heat your oil in a heavy pot, like a dutch oven, and when it's nice and hot, add your zucchini in batches.  They will take a good 5 minutes to fry and brown up to a crispy consistency.  Do not add all your zuc at once because it will overcrowd the pan. 

You don't need any breading on these, unlike many other zuc chip recipes.  Just hot oil!  Once you remove them from the oil, let them drain on a paper-towel lined plate and sprinkle immediately with sea salt.

Enjoy!

Zucchini Crust Pizza

It is so awesome to eat pizza.  So. Freaking. Awesome.  

It's also awesome to eat zucchini.

It's awesome when my husband and baby hippo eat zucchini, and other green veg, not only without hesitation, but excitedly!

It's awesome when you can make a formerly shitty food good for you.

It's awesome when you don't miss grainy, starchy, carby crap.

It's awesome to eat pizza.

The end.

Zucchini Crust Awesome Pizza 

(serves 2 adults and 1 baby hippo)

-4 zuch's, pulsed in the cuisi until it's very finely chopped

-1 tsp minced garlic

-2 eggs, beaten

-1 tsp oregano

-1 tsp kosher salt

-bag of mozzarella 

-half can of your preferred pizza sauce

-toppings of choice (pictured- a fried egg with pizza sauce over it, and roasted red peppers)

Preheat your oven to 425.  Drain your zuch for at least 20 minutes and get as much water out as possible.  Then microwave it for 10 minutes, stirring halfway through.  Let it cool for a few minutes, then mix in two beaten eggs, garlic, oregano, and salt.  On greased baking sheet (I did use parchment paper this time and did not have a problem) spread crust mixture out evenly using the back of your spoon.  Each individual pizza was about three teaspoons and I got 6 total.  You might get more or less depending on how big your zucchini, how much water, etc.  I made mine pretty thin because I didn't want them to be soggy or underdone.  Bake until the edges are brown, even verging on a little burnt.  Bake time will differ but mine took about 30 min (my oven is weird though!)

Remove from oven and spread your sauce and cheese on top, and whatever other toppings you want.  Your toppings will need to be fully cooked first because when you stick it back in the oven, you are just melting the cheese.  That takes all of three minutes and you're dunzo!

Cauli pizza is great too- but some people aren't so into cauli.  Plus- we tend to eat it a lot and it's nice to switch things up.  However, zucchini has a lot more water and is nowhere near as starchy- so cauliflower will yield a slightly firmer, thicker crust.  Whatever.  This pizza is awesome.

Zucchini Noodle (Zoodle) Pad Thai

Like Thai food?  Sad you can't eat noodles, like pad thai?  Have no fear, the great Zoodle is here.

This recipe is dope.  Tastes SPOT on.  It was inspired by this recipe.  I've adapted it slightly as I eat a modified paleo diet- I'm not a full-blown cavegirl quite yet. 

Zucchini Noodle (Zoodle) Pad Thai
3 medium zucchinis, julienned with your fancy shmancy julienne peeler that costs $9 from BBB and is the best kitchen gadget EVER
4 green onions, chopped
1 inch of ginger, minced (did you know you could buy fresh ginger and freeze it, and break off little amounts as you need it?)
1 1/2 tsp minced garlic
1 tbsp fish sauce
juice of half a lime or a couple squeezes from the green lime-shaped bottle (I won't tell)
4 tsp natural peanut butter
1 tbsp chili garlic sauce
kosher salt
some filtered water nearby
*sprinkle of some stevia is optional if you want to sweeten it up just a bit like a more traditional pad thai

In a large saute pan, saute your green onions in some EVOO or coconut oil for a few minutes, then throw in your minced garlic and ginger.  Add a bit of salt, then add in your fish sauce, chili garlic sauce, lime juice, and PB.  At this point, I added probably 2 or 3 tbsp of water because I wanted a thinner sauce.  Taste your sauce and see what it needs more of at this point, because bland pad thai would suck, and because zucchinis taste like nothing so you better have some yummy sauce!  Throw in your zoodles and cook in sauce for about 10 minutes.  This dish rocks.  Would be great with some chicken.  I was lazy and didn't make chicken.

Instead, I made M this fun kimchi and cucumber salad with a fried egg.

Weeknight dinner done in no time at all folks.

Zucchini Noodles and an awesome new kitchen gadget

Today's post involved both of the above pictured items.  I am quickly beginning to realize what a wonder-veg (is a zuc a veg?  I know it's a squash, hmmm) zucchini is.  Fabulous in pancakes, breads, and noodle-less lasagna, it really is the multi-tasker of the produce world.  It's even more amazing in noodle-form, and I don't mean long wide slices, I mean spaghetti looking noodles.  I thought I needed a fancy spiralizer, but nope!  One of these handy julienne peelers does the trick just fine and costs less than $10!  This peeler would be great for yellow squash, eggplant, carrots, cucumbers, you name it. 

I was never much of a pasta girl (although I do really miss Pad See Ew, the thai-noodle dish) so missing out on linguine or angel hair or spaghetti doesn't bother me much.  But what I do miss are the great sauces.  Meatball, marinara, spicy seafood sauce, clam, whatever.  It doesn't make much sense to eat plain sauce with nothing to accompany it.  Boring.  Julienne Peeler- check.  Zucchini- check.  Problem solved.  The one and only draw back is that you do need quite a few zucchinis to feed 3 or 4 people.  As with all veg, they shrink up a ton when you cook them. 

Garlic Parmesan Zucchini Pasta
3 medium sized zucchinis, julienne sliced into long thin noodles
1 tsp minced garli
2 tsp Meyer Lemon EVOO (or regular EVOO is just fine)
1/3 cup shredded parm
Kosher salt and pepper to taste

Heat up your oil in a large skillet, then throw in your garlic and cook for 30 seconds.  Add your zuc noodles and season liberally.  The noodles will release a ton of water.  I cooked my noodles until they had become soft and most of the water was cooked off, then I sprinkled the parm over it and stirred it together so the cheese melted.  This was enough for 3 good sized servings.  If this is your main dish however, I'd probably double it.  This doesn't taste like zucchini, nor does it taste quite like pasta.  But texture-wise and mouth-feel wise you do kinda think you're eating noodles.  Without the god-awful bloat and blood sugar meltdown.  Best of all, this can be the base recipe to a zillion noodle/pasta dishes.  You could even use them as your noodles in soup.  So give it a try if you've not already!  Also, the perfect consistency for your little ones!  XoXoGFG

Grain-Free Zucchini Pancakes (Latkes)

Traditionally during Chanukah a dish called latkes are served, which are basically potato pancakes, to remind us of the miracle of a single container of oil, lasting the Maccabee clan 8 days around 165 BCE when Judaism was outlawed in Jerusalem.  The latkes are fried in oil which stinks up your entire house for at least 8 days, again reminding you I guess of story of the Maccabees haha.  Many cultures have potato pancakes and they basically taste like a big round fried tater tot- how could that be bad?  But low-carb and GFG-friendly they are not!  So behold my Zucchini Latkes- Jewish or not- these are delish and also a great way to get kids to eat zucchini.

Grain-Free/Gluten-Free Low-Carb Zucchini Pancakes (Latkes)
2 small zucchini, or one very large zucchini, grated and water squeezed out
1 egg
1/4 cup parmesan
2 tablespoons chickpea flour (besan)
1/4 tsp paprika
salt and pepper
1/4 tsp minced garlic
EVOO for pan

Using your shredder attachment for your food processor, shred your zucchini.  Place in a large clean dishtowel and wring out as much water as possible.  Place in large mixing bowl.  Add to bowl one egg, salt and pepper, paprika, garlic, chickpea flour, and parmesan, and combine well.  You want it to have a thick batter consistency and stick together well.  If it's a bit watery, add a tsp more of your chickpea flour.  In a hot frying pan, add a tablespoon of EVOO and drop using tablespoon scoops onto hot pan.  You want the pan to be sizzling at this point.  With a spatula, spread the pancakes out evenly.  Flip after about 2 minutes, making sure each side is browned and crispy.  Serve with sour cream, applesauce, or eat plain!  They are really delish.