Thursday, June 23, 2011

6/23/11 and I'm grateful for...

79 degrees and cherry treadmill...Door County in one week...and the topic of today's post, my first bff I made here in KC, RMJF.

Me and Baby S at 5 days old, and RMJF
I met RM in June of 2006, although we weren't formally introduced until that October, and I think we all went on our first date in February of 2007.  RM was the first MOT girlfriend I made here and also very significant because her husband and MKG became friends as well and really they became our first couple friends.  This is huge in the development of any relationship and marriage.  Your ability to make couple friends and eventually, develop groups of couple friends.  I honestly had no idea how integral to your marriage your group of couple friends would become.  But it is HUGE.  If you do not have a large group of couple friends that both you and husband like and agree on, man you are doomed!  So anyways, RM really was the first, numero uno, and will always be a bestie to me and occupies a very special place in my heart.  We have been through all our adult milestones and have shared tons of life lessons.  She has been with me every step of the way as I navigated learning to love this city, became a fiancee, then a wife, and finally, a mom! And vice versa, I have watched her as she matured into the perfect wife, now mother, and now expecting again!  I am exactly one day older than RM, and we have many similarities.  We are both into health and fitness, proper diet and nutrition, and making sure our families eat properly.  We love travel and Bravo, and shopping, though we rarely ever do it anymore, we love restaurants and seeing movies, although we never do that anymore either!  But it's really our differences and how they mesh so well together that I cherish the most.  RM is a goody goody and probably the nicest human on earth.  Some of my favorite memories with her and when I've managed to drag some gossip and shit talk out of her.  She doesn't give in easily and will often preface shit talk with "well I don't like to talk negatively about so and so, but..." and then I know it's going to be a good convo!  Over the years as we've become more comfortable with each other I find it's easier to get her in the gossiping mood, which is great because I'm one of those people who should buy the bumper sticker that says "If you don't have anything nice to say, sit next to me."  Now gossiping is not the same as bitching, moaning, complaining, or whining.  If you want to shoot the shit and talk about people that's one thing, but complaining and generally being an immature brat is a completely different subject.  Complaining, whining, and poor me type talk I have absolutely no patience for whatsoever and may even have adverse physical reactions to.  I just cannot stand it.  And as luck would have it, husband is probably the king of poor me type talk.  Ahhhhhhhhh but that's another story!

Back to my point- I love gossip, not mean spirited or venomous gossip, just talking about people and things and analyzing and critiquing and picking apart different subjects and friends and occurrences.  People Places and Things baby.  Love talking about 'em.  I think the reason for this is twofold.  One, I come from a big family, of many women.  And two, I come from a big Jewish family.  And of course, as all the stereotypes dictate, small talk, gossip, and kibbitzing is our natural birthright and sport of choice.  No, as ethnicities go we are not generally the best athletes, but our mouths certainly get a better work out than any other culture, that's for sure.  And for that too, I am grateful.  Jews running their mouths, goes hand in hand like peanut butter and jelly.  Now that is something husband is extremely skilled at.  The guy can run his mouth unlike anyone you have ever met.  Exhaustively.  It's incredible, and quite a feat.  Very impressive.  And I am not employing the use of sarcasm here, I really mean it.  His knack for mouth-running is really something to marvel at. 

So- I love to gossip.  Got it.  RM, while much nicer than me and just a more superior human being all-around, also likes to gossip, and we have enjoyed many many hours of gossiping over the years and as we get older, the gossip just keeps getting better and better!  She has also been a fantastic teacher and shoulder to lean on.  She has been one step ahead of me for years now- first with getting married, then with buying a house, getting pregnant, having a baby- I can always depend on her to tell me everything I need to know about any given situation, which is great because she is always prepared, always educated, and always organized, while I can be quite a dope.  I never bothered reading any baby books because I knew I could rely on her wealth of knowledge on any baby-related subject.  I suppose she somewhat enables my laziness, which I'm too lazy to care about, which is another thing I'm grateful for!  While she is a doer, a planner, a constant stream of energy, I tend to be a bit more lax, and live in the "ignorance is bliss" camp.  And honestly, it works for us!  We are great friends, better than ever, and I am endlessly, hopelessly, thoroughly, and happily grateful to her for our friendship, for her help, undying support, care, kindness, and generosity.

Ignorance- now that is another interesting topic, and something I am grateful for as well.  Of course I am not speaking of racial ignorance, sexual ignorance, religious ignorance and or intolerance of any kind.  I just mean plain old, duh stupid ignorance.  Sometimes what you don't know can't hurt you.  I like being informed and in the know and wordly.  I like knowing what's going on in the world and the country and our city and having something of value to add to our universal dialogue.  I want to make a worthwhile contribution to society, don't get me wrong.  But gosh aren't there times you just wish you didn't know something?  Or times you honest to god truly don't know the answer to something and could not give a shit?  I remember when I was in junior high, I was obsessed with the stars, galaxies, far away planets, the universe.  It still intrigues me to no end.  But jesus if that stuff isn't one giant boondoggle clusterfuck of a headache.  How in god's name can you ever even begin to wrap your mind around the perplexity and complexity of our universe?  Known knowns, known uknowns, unknown knowns, unknown uknowns etc etc.  Ugh.  It hurts my brain, it did then and it does now.  And I remember thinking about it so much and so hard that it upset me, I became somewhat hopeless and listless.  If the universe was so big, so wide, so old, and so impossible to understand, what did that mean for you as an individual? And how could you persuade yourself to think that your one life had any significance whatsoever?  If you are just one nano-particle in a vast universe, what the hell difference does your life make?  It can be a tough subject, and one I often wished I didn't think about.  Lots of people don't.  That is the type of ignorance I mean.  Sometimes its ok to be stupid.  Sometimes its ok to watch Real Housewives of Orange County and lose a few brain cells on junk tv.  I don't recommend you do it all day everyday, but once in awhile, a little stupidity can be replenishing I think.  That should be my blog's title, In Defense of Stupidity. 

So today, I'm grateful for beautiful weather, my favorite diet soda, my bestie RM, and good ol' ignorance.  A little bit won't kill ya. 

A bientot friends, keep on giving thanks!

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